You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
areolas are like halos for boobs.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Randomize
