Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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