I got chris browned last night
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
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