Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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