I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
