Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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