I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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