Screwed.edu
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
