I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
Acid is not a monday night drug
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
We left an ass print on the piano.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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