Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Randomize
