at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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