Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Randomize
