DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Randomize
