I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
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