I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
