you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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