TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
