You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Randomize
