i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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