Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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