Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize