I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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