That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Randomize
