your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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