that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
