that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
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