I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize