This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
