If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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