69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize