So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
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