I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
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