some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
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