nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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