let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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