Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
did i just pee glitter
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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