My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Randomize
