you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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