soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Randomize
