is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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