the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
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