hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
