Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Drunk walkin through police station. America
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
