It's just like the Real World with babies
Everything about him screamed your future.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Actions speak louder than pants.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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