I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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