Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
