You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
OPIZZABONMYDICK
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize
