The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
We need a shit load of segways right now
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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