More tranny stories later!
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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