how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Randomize
