Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I believe in your delicious
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Randomize
