I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
